People often ask me why did I choose this path of complete renunciation? I did not. It has been laid down for me by God. I was born to fulfill this mission. The decision was not on me, but it has been slowly revealing to me from inside and outside over many years. It was not an instant, but gradual revelation. To do the will of God, and live in His awareness every day is the highest path one can follow. No matter what garb you are wearing; it is the inner call one must always follow. It is revealed to many, but people do not usually listen to the voice of intuition (which is the voice of God), and drown it with many desires for sense objects, thus deluded by Mahamaya (Cosmic Illusion) they fail to find the true happiness, the all encompassing-success, and full realization of who they truly are. Another life is wasted in pursuing the transient pleasures. It is like trying to build the palace, in a dream. When you wake up, you realize that whatever you were working on was erased once you opened your eyes.

The same analogy can be applied to the reality we live it. It is not the true reality, neither is the appearance we identify ourselves with. What we are, we have to inquire and find out for ourselves. The world will not tell us; it will do everything to pull us away from us. There is no one we can turn to help, but to dive deep inside. When we are truly sincere God will send us a Satguru who alone is capable to lead us to our final destination. There are many gurus, teachers, etc, but only one Satguru preordained for us. One such is Paramahamsa Sri Swami Vishwananda. The title paramahamsa denotes the one who is like a supreme swan. A swan has the ability to separate milk from water. He is ever free, and can be in both material and spiritual world at the same time, and not affected by the Cosmic Illusion. His name, Vishwananda, means Universal Bliss. He is the perfect choice, if you truly decide to realize yourself, or to realize God. He is fully qualified to guide you safely to your true home, to experience Universal Bliss for yourself.

Today, 14 October, one year ago, I was initiated as a sannyas in Sri Sampradaya lineage.

That day marks my new birth, as I renounced completely my old life. Actually, it was not the first time that I consecrated my life. The first time was when I became a brahmachari (a monk, a renunciant) in 2006. For me, being a brahmachari and now a swami, means completely the same thing, although the mission or duty, on the outside, is different. As of inside, I have renounced worldly life a long time ago, even before I became officially a brahmachari.

“My birthday is your birthday. You know, humans actually have two birthdays. First birthday is when one is born into this physical world, and second one is when one meets his Satguru, because only then real life starts! Your second birthday was the day when you have realized that you belong to me!”– Paramahamsa Sri Swami Vishwananda

This quote from Guruji is something I was waiting for him to say for a long time. He verbalized it on his birthday celebration, June 13th 2016. I actually never liked birthday celebrations. Whenever people would sing the popular ‘Happy Birthday’ song, I would run away.

It felt so fake to me. And I was also very happy that Guruji recently said that he never liked the song either. When devotees have birthdays all we do now, as a token of love and appreciation for having them in our lives, is to sing a Sanskrit birthday mantra: OM Karam Pranamyaham Janam Dïna Binandanam…. and throw rose petals on they head a sign of our love and respect. No need for any emotions to rise. We don’t have birth, neither do we have death. We are eternal.

When we die, we just change the rooms, or the outer dress (if that makes it easier to depict), that’s all. The separation is only seeming. That is why I don’t celebrate my birthday. My true birthday is when I met my Satguru and recognized him as my own. When I felt that I belonged to him and that he belonged to me, nothing else mattered.

And it is very true what Guruji said: his birthday is our birthday, as he came for us alone, and we came for him. There is an eternal bond between us, which is not of this life, nor of the last, but from the inception of time.

“The relationship between the guru and the disciple lasts forever. Even if you were to break it, it would carry on because it is the inner relationship. The more one surrenders to that relationship, the more one is aware of that inner connection.”– Paramahamsa Sri Swami Vishwananda

To celebrate one’s birthday is like glorifying Maya (untruth). Yes, I acknowledge also this reality and that without having a physical birth (by physical parents) we would not have been here. Only in this plane we can work out our desires and dreams, and realize God. If we bear this in mind, then the birthday celebration will have a completely different perspective. We will not glorify the ‘I’, ‘Me’ or ‘Mine’, but Him who has sent us. We did not come here because of our own will, but due to His Grace, which is everything. We have numerous births on Earth, and this one is one of many. We have no age, we are eternal.

When I got initiated last year, it was truly a new birth. The old ‘me’ was gone. I really felt the inner transformation, and it has been revealing itself more and more as the days and months went by. Now, one year after, I feel like I have lived 20 years within this single year. Life has become so intense and so beautiful. To help people, to help them realise and bring closer to their own selves is the greatest gift God has given me. The only joy I have in this life is to show people the way how to get closer to God, how to live a better life. No other dreams do I have, but to serve my Guruji is the capacity he has given me.

Guruji asked me many times to write a book, a story about my spiritual journey. Let this be an introduction, a teaser, so that you get the idea of what the book will be about. Don’t ask me when the book will be finished. In the meantime, follow me on my journey, and share it with those who may be inspired to read my journals as I move on. Thank you for being a part of my life.

Love and blessings,

After 10 years spent in the ashram of my Guru Paramahamsa Vishwananda I was ready for next step in my spiritual evolution… I was initiated in the ancient monastic order of swami and sent back to Croatia as per direct instruction of Paramahamsa Viswhananada, in order to spread his mission there.